Is anybody out there?

I mentioned that recently I've started to explore cancer sites and cancer blogs.  Part of me can't seem to let go of my experience, part of me wants to know more about it....education is prevention, right?
Recurrance is never far from my mind.

I thought I started this blog to help others who may be just beginning the winding path of this experience, but maybe I started it to help myself.  If I document it, I won't forget it, right?  I don't really want to forget it.  I don't want to go back to life as usual.  I should have learned something earth shattering, somthing life changing. Returning to my previously non-descript existence makes it all seem so pointless. I wanted it to change my life.  It really hasn't. I haven't stopped working too many hours.  I haven't become a better parent, a better wife, a better person. I haven't found God. I haven't devoted my free time to a worthy cause.
So I keep searching for answers.  I keep hoping for some sign that someone is reading and getting something out of this blog.  I really would like to know that it's helping someone at some point. But I've had no comments.  Well, actually one really irrelevant comment that I deleted because it contained a link to a salmonella site.  (WTF?)
I have not shared the fact that I have a blog with my family or friends, so I'm hoping to suck in random strangers from search engines and other cancer sites.
Speaking of which, that may be a good topic for a post unto itself....sharing your cancer diagnosis and treatment experience.  Or not.